It's about reading and angels

This piece by Garrison Keillor, a voice who sounds like an old friend, shatters my cynicism, if only for a little while. Thanks to Swift and Change Able for this one.

Bless their hearts

In case you didn't know, the title is southern code for "these folks are clueless." So I direct the phrase both at the well-meaning guidance counselor who sent us all the article containing the following, and at the kids who really do need us to teach them this stuff; it's appalling how many do. Here's what I should be teaching along with reading, writing, vocabulary and literature:

• having stable relationships with peers
• possessing well-developed problem solving skills
• considering realistic future plans
• having a positive sense of being able to achieve and deal effectively with tasks
• experiencing success in one or more areas of their life
• being able to effectively communicate
• possessing a strong attachment with at least one adult
• acceptance of responsibility for themselves and their behavior

I do like to think I make a small dent in the two I've put in red, but the others they'll have to pick up along the way. If some of it happens in my class, (maybe that fourth bullet point), that's great. Just please don't make me the object of a strong attachment. And I remember a long, ridiculous, conversation with a tearful parent when she believed I'd dashed her child's confidence forever when I suggested he might need to study more if he expected to get into an Ivy League school, so I'm not big on helping kids make realistic plans.

I had a little laugh when I read the list during school today. It was nothing like the laugh I had reading the standards for a sixth grade history class I once was preparing to teach that began "The student will understand history from the beginning of time to the Renaissance." Who wrote that? The state education brainiacs, of course. Nevertheless, I did save this list to look at and share as I knew the teachers in our blog circle might enjoy it. Which ones would you say your teaching style hits?

Several other bloggable moments happened today, but there are so many papers to grade, I must do a few before my energy is totally gone.

Early OCD or the numbers are killing me

Those who know me would say I am not obsessive about anything. Some might even say I could use a bit of compulsion to fuel more action, but in any case, here's a chain of thoughts that has begun to feel like mild mental illness. It started innocently enough with a fascination with statistics and a willingness to analyze them. This is relatively new for this language lover; if I had known how much I would come to love numbers, I would have worked harder in math class. Perhaps around the time of the big fuss over America being over 300 million, the idea of repetitions, or more specifically, simultaneous activities, began to occupy my thoughts. When turning the key in the ignition of my car, I would think "How many other people are turning the key in the ignition at this very second?" The instances of this can be infinite. As I turn off my alarm, the thought of tens of thousands of beeps (more?) being silenced by sleepy people wakes me. As warm water courses over my hands before lunch I can't help thinking, "How many others are washing their hands?" I sometimes intentionally imagine several others in the act, but my brain is limited, a point this exercise reminds me over and over, and I move on to other things. But the count, or the concept of this number of simultaneous activities that cannot be counted arrives repeatedly. It comes at me at more intimate moments as well, but I'll let you imagine those.

And it's more than my activities that are multiple, common acts. In the mall food court a young mother plays peek-a-boo with her baby and I contemplate the scope of peek-a-boo. How many games played at this minute? How many throughout time? Something trivial takes on odd importance. Yesterday, in a thrift store, (where a brochure told me a woman is raped every 46 seconds--how do they know that?) the game took a turn as I looked around for my friend and found not one, but three other women in the store of about the same age, hair, build, dress, etc. How many women are there that fit my friend's description? As much as I have contemplated simultaneous activities, I hadn't thought much about duplication in appearance although, of course, it's everywhere.

The worst part about it is the anxiety it provokes. Okay, there are many, many people in the world and our experiences bear strong similarities. So what? How does this change my life? I don't think I'm over-invested in my own uniqueness, although our society seems to force us to focus on being distinctive, being different, even while fitting in. Do people in Japan have this problem? What exactly is the problem? Am I simply freaked out by the number of people in the world? Is this an identity issue? I truly don't mind my own insignificance, like a sky full of stars I find it comforting in some ways. Is it that the numbers are too big for me to conceptualize while I have a need to do so? I am pretty good at accepting what I can't understand, Lord knows I've come across plenty that fits into that category.

Once I tried to explain this to a friend and she basically told me I was stupid to give any mental energy to it. Of course, she said it a little nicer, after all, she is a friend. The reason it feels like OCD is because I can't turn it off, but it does feel better to at least see it in words. Is there a use for this concept? If I have to live with it, I'd like to find some value in it.

2008 will be...

So there's talk of resolutions in the air. This annual chatter I sometimes ignore and sometimes engage in. I agree with Cora that it is endearing and refuse to be a total cynic. This year I've been silent if others advertise their resolutions, but this looks like a safe place to low-ball mine, so here goes--I plan to read and write more for my own growth and pleasure. That's it, no numbers, goals, pages--no quantifiable data by which I can be sure I've failed, just a general push in the right direction. I plan to exercise more-this will be easy since I've basically been a potato lately, a sweet potato, but a potato nonetheless. I plan to eat less sweets, another easy one as I've been on a sugar buzz or displaying sugar-seeking behaviors since around Thanksgiving.

I've been on an organizing and cleaning binge here at home and that feels like a good way to begin 2008 to me.

Happy New Year!